I am a pretty permissive parent. I really want Elli to grow up without the idea that sex is bad and naughty and that she should be ashamed of it. I want her to think of her body as entirely natural and okay. This is all fine and well up to a point, of course, and then it gets a little bit weird. I am totally convinced that giving fairly thorough, clear answers to questions like "Where to babies come from?" at age four is the right thing to do. Taking Elli to a sex fetish store with me... not so much.
Oh, settle down.
I am not going to the store to buy fetish gear, just a UtiliKilt. I got some birthday money and was stumped about what to do with it so I decided that since people who give birthday money want me to get something cool that I wouldn't normally buy for myself I should go do that. UtiliKilts are far more money than I would normally sink into a pair of shorts but they are stone cold awesome and should last forever; they work perfectly for a proxy birthday present. Of course the only outlet for UtiliKilts anywhere near me is a fetish store that seems to focus primarily on gay men. In what should come as no surprise Elli decided that she wanted to accompany me to the store to buy my kilt.
Now I am all for explaining sex and human plumbing to four year olds but I am not convinced that I really want to start talking about the use and purpose of whips, ball stretchers, gags, butt plugs and other sex fetish gear. For the moment I am satisfied with her understanding sex as an enjoyable thing that adults do with each other that can make babies if the adults are of opposite genders. The details of BDSM are probably best left to another day. If that turns out to be something Elli wants to do I am happy to explain it and let her go do her thing... but perhaps I should let her find out about it when she is a touch older than five.
My parents are probably torn between relief that I am not taking her to the fetish store and horror that I thought about it. I swear I am just trying to be all new age and sex positive, not creepy. Honest!
Photo from http://www.utilikilts.com/company/products/kilts/mocker/