Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Once more, not quite, thankfully

Today Elli got really sick.  I was volunteering outside the school after pickup time selling tickets for the upcoming Fun Fair on Saturday.  The day was clear and hot and I wish I had brought my hat.  Elli was with me and complained that her stomach didn't feel great and her head hurt.  I got her to drink water and sit in the shade but by the time we left she was in terrible shape.  I had to carry her home on my back with the groceries and school stuff in my arms, which was a bit of a trick at times.  By the time we arrived home I got to experience what it is like to have a sick child vomit on your back just before you arrive at the bathroom.

I think pursuing unique experiences is a great thing, generally speaking.  That said, I don't think there is much to recommend getting puke on your back.  It isn't much different from getting puke elsewhere but it is extra annoying to clean up.

The really scary thing about it wasn't the simple logistics of cleanup though, but rather that Elli's ongoing kidney issues manifest as vomiting.  When she threw up I was filled with visions of more hospital trips, blood tests, imaging, and antibiotics treatments.  Going through that was rough for me and it had to be an awful lot worse for someone who actually had to deal with the pain and trauma personally.  I was so happy to recently get the news that Elli was pretty much back to normal and the doctors felt there was little need to see her again so even a hint that she might be relapsing was terrifying.

Thankfully it seems like she only had heat stroke.  Heat stroke isn't great obviously but at least it is defined, temporary, and straightforward to deal with.  It doesn't have the spectre of long term damage and won't keep on popping up randomly at the worst possible time.

It sure doesn't take much to suddenly bunch me up with tension, to ratchet up my worry that Elli is suddenly back to being scarily sick with something that has little in the way of solutions.  Even though I know that throwing up is unlikely to be a sign of her old illness that worry is hard to shed.  I am particularly good at not worrying about things beyond my control and at shutting down my fretting when logic tells me I should not be concerned.... and yet all it takes to get my adrenalin pumping is for her to say that her tummy doesn't feel well.  Such is being a parent I suppose.

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