Sunday, June 12, 2016

Not good

I went to see the Warcraft movie.  It was not good.

On the other hand, I had a lot of fun.

This should surprise no one, really.  The movie was a CGI explosion, full of people riding gryphons and orcs and magic spells.  It was chock full of all kinds of references to Warcraft that I enjoyed greatly.  Also the reviews were absolutely awful.  All that adds up to a movie that hardcore Warcraft nerds like me will enjoy, and most normal people will find ridiculous.

It couldn't have been otherwise, really.  A movie trying to tell a story with a bazillion named characters that is way too long for normal movie length isn't going to work.  They could have told the whole story and had it feel rushed and ridiculous, and that would have angered the Warcraft nerds who actually wanted to see all the stuff.  Instead they chopped it down and only told a small chunk of the story, which left the ending feeling arbitrary and unfulfilling.

So if you are considering going to see the movie, consider this:

If you will mark out for people riding through Elwynn Forest and hearing this in the background

then you should probably go see Warcraft.

If you remember fighting Moroes in Karazhan, especially if you tried it with 3 Dwarves, 2 frost mages, and 2 paladins, (which kinda trivializes Moroes) then you should go see Warcraft.

If you are a normal person and don't know what the hell those last two sentences mean, you should probably give it a pass.  It is a badly written, nonsensical movie with really good CGI and epic scenes of magic and mayhem.  There are lots of movies out there these days that have all the CGI and far less of the awful.

Also, as a side note that probably deserves it own post, can somebody tell directors of movies that not everyone in a fantasy movie needs to be a white guy?  I get that they are working from established lore, but come on.  This isn't feudal England, we are talking about a world with fireballs and murlocs and fel magic.  Add a bit more diversity to the movie, even if it does drive some of the grognards to frenzies of anger.  The future will thank you.

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