Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Suspicious underwear

I have been upping my workout regimen over the past week and it has had some predictable effects on my routine.  Mostly it is about showering - when I walk back into my condo completely soaked in sweat I can't just wait twelve hours to shower at my normal time!  However, there is a secondary shift in my habits which specifically relates to underwear.

I always used to change into fresh underwear each morning.  Simple, easy, predictable.  But now it only makes sense to change right after a workout.  Workouts are a random times though, so sometimes that means I get all sweaty in the evening, shower, wear new underwear for an hour, then toss them on the floor and go to sleep.

In the morning I know I should put on that underwear from last night because after all I only wore them for an hour.  They aren't dirty... and yet my brain maintains an unquenchable suspicion of the floor undies.

I should just put them on, I think.  Wear them till after the workout, then get fresh non gross ones.  It just makes sense.

But something deep in my brain whispers that the underwear were on the floor all night.  They are dirty, soiled, disgusting.

They aren't, of course.  They are not even distinguishable from fresh ones from the drawer.

And yet I can't shake that feeling that it is wrong to put them on.

If I were a normal person I could just solve this by going through 2 pairs of underwear a day, but a totally different part of my brain would be horrified at the waste and unnecessary extravagance.  2 pairs a day?  Forever?  Madness!  What kind of absurd dandy do I think I am?  Do I care nothing for the environment and the wasted water and energy to clean all those extra underwear?

So every morning I put on a pair of underwear I have already worn.  I know I still change once a day, I know the timing is right, and yet I still start each morning staring at the underwear on the floor with deep seated suspicion.

Sometimes I wonder how I manage to have any energy left for fighting with the rest of the world after I am done fighting with myself about such simple things as what underwear to put on.


  1. Instead of putting them on the floor at night, hang them on a doorknob or hook. Only clean air will touch them there; no icky floor germs.

  2. Yeah, basically seconding the first comment. You could even go all out and fold the underwear for yourself and decide on a place it "belongs" before you go to bed if that would help.

  3. I completely understand. In the morning I can put a shirt on from the night before, but underwear or socks are "icky".

    Of course, once I've put them on, I've forgotten about it 5 minutes later. But still, yuck!

  4. I read this last night, then slept on it. I realized this post stood out afterwards because something just didn't click. Then I realised...as a cis woman, I have no guilt over wearing two or more pairs of underwear a day. No it's not just vanity or my slight control-freakish habit of ensuring my bra and underwear match...it's biology, specifically anatomy.

    That said, I understand not wanting to waste resources (energy, water, detergent, time) on a washing a barely used pair. What if the barely used underwear was folded and put back in the drawer? That way you might trick yourself into letting go of that suspicion (it could backfire -- you might end up suspicious of every pair -- but I think this plan has potential)

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  6. A. My previous comment was deleted because it was an exact duplicate of the first one I made.
    B. On second thought, maybe you just need this: https://www.meundies.com/products/the-365-pack